Meretricis smegma, or: more fun with Google Translate (Reader Challenge)
Long-time readers might recall a blogpost I wrote two or three years ago about the charms of mechanical translation as per Google Translate, which Ravenrux decried in the comments, but I prefer to cherish and celebrate.
Earlier today I updated the post to enlighten readers on what Google Translate says an Italian tweet, "que chevenga la chevecha anda chuve chive la chevechaa que che chuvee a la cabechaaa", means in English.*
But then, after experimenting with the ability of Latin to make any passage more elegant, no matter how little gravitas it had in the original, I hit upon a reader challenge idea, hence a fresh blogpost.
Ergo, gobs of glory will accrue to the first reader, who, either by use of their Latin knowledge (more impressive) or Google Translate (more fun), correctly identifies the post in Philosopher in Arms whose ultimate three paragraphs, Google Translated into Latin--or a language that outwardly resembles Latin--read as follows.
Sed manifestum est # IV stupri. Non tamen tenetur a mauris nec clam te est quod beatus est. Et denique, te stupri partem olim iam crustas meretricis smegma, vestri 'questus quod vis. Secundum quod vidisti, et statuit. Aliquam mauris quam minuit minigh miniren, præcordia vulturem juxta genus suum, ut non procul a mauris a carro sterquilinio bug intra foeda, pus ferri debet indui vestibus regiis, concidit cadaver tuum in sacculum Computruerunt stercore, ut cum tuae ad se Arko stupri. Assignavimus vos ad me principes, et quecumque Vestibulum mauris Lorem dominarum LINTEUM PLACENTA et circulus pugnat. Tempus est ergo ad eum fama de recto, ita non ad morbum deficientibus animis hauriebantur gurgitibus, viderunt lepram in conlectus more lambebant RUCTO, inducens in chunks NUTAMEN de stercore, quod in facie tua est.
Vestibulum in spiritu, non impediat, si hoc verbo non minuit okas semitarii of fabulam, excepto te, ex tribus mauris turpis incessu duros nequeunt movere in tempore, lactans de Mantuae vel ore, sic comminuet, et dabo ignem spirans dura ventris tui recta asino super viis stupri. Nam ipsum.
Interdum modo elabitur,
Carpe diem, horde ravenus.
1) The capitalization in the Latin did not originate with the English. I am not sure where it originated. Possibly a mysterious internal Google process related to cosmic rays, brownian motion or a misaligned hamster-wheel in among the vast hamster-wheel arrays at Google's central processing complex. In other words, it is Not My Fault. Of course I could have edited it out. I did not, for the reason of which I am usually guilty: entertainment value.
2) I would like to point out a most extraordinary thing, a hint that perhaps, at least when all the hamster-wheels are running smoothly, the Google Translate technology occasionally accesses quantum or transcendent--perhaps even divine--energies, to achieve the most remarkable results.
Somehow, going from English to Latin and then back again, the utility has managed to change the last line, a sarcastic, flippant closing salutation, into an explanation whose tone could even be interpreted as appropriately apologetic for the text it follows. In other words, Google Translate transformed what the writer of the post's text wrote... to what he ought to have written.
An almost Anardikan miracle of modern technology!
3) Hint: Google Translate just the Latin word "stupri". Then, using your own knowledge (since Google Translate suffers the deficiency of not yet including Arkan) translate that into Arkan.
4) Second hint: "# IV" in the Latin is a straight translation, i.e. "#4."
Correct use of these two hints makes it easy.
*"que anda chuve chevecha chevenga the chive the chevechaa that this chuvee to the cabechaaa."